Shielding of Mrs Forbes

Thinking his wife is in the bath one evening, Graham watches a late night television programme on Channel 4, Footballers With Their Shirts Off when his wife Betty walks in on him...

'I didn't know you were interested in football,' said Betty.

No one must ever find out that Graham is 'not the marrying sort'. Certainly not his wife, or his mother. As sex, blackmail and fanatical tidiness take over their home in the West Yorkshire parish of Alwoodley, an unlikely caper unfolds.